Nothing says I'm leader like acting like an ape

Don’t worry (or maybe you should) I’m not going to discuss the presidential campaign but am back to the classroom, ruminating about my students.

Last Friday I had the best discussions in my two freshman classes. (Best meaning, of this semester, not best as in, one of the best discussions of my life.) I had them read Paul Theroux’s “Being a Man”. I was hoping we could jump right in to talking about gender roles in the US and maybe even nurture verses nature when it comes to defining one’s sense of self in terms of sex. This didn’t happen. Instead, I had to start discussing sports. They perked right up and joined in, but through out class I showed my ignorance of the entire sports world. I kept saying linebacker, realized I was referring to the wrong position, and the only thing I could come up with was: the fat guys in front of the quarter back. Then I asked if any of them had seen the cover of Vogue which they thought was hilarious and the laughter only got worse when I called the basketball player Bronson James.

Anyway, during my second class’s discussion we started talking about leadership and the majority of the students were saying that men made better leaders. It was just in their nature. I pointed out that one of the soft-spoken female students who sits in the front of the class was the best leader in that room. Guys, when she speaks you listen, I said. You listen to her better than you do me. She waits her turn, speaks quietly, but speaks her mind and makes intelligent comments when she has them. Everyone stopped and chewed this idea over, but then one student argued furiously that I was wrong.

It was the female student I had pointed out. While all the other students could only agree with me, she was adamant that she was not a good leader. I really don’t like English at all, she said. That has nothing to do with being a good leader, I responded. No, I’ve been in college before and I’m coming back. I’ve already taken several speech courses so I can express myself. I’m married and have a kid, so I just have more experience than most of the other students in here. It’s not that I’m more intelligent, it’s just that I can form my ideas more quickly than most freshmen.

When I told a fellow professor about my student’s response he said, so she’s more articulate, more experienced and therefore more intelligent, and she finds it very easy to make people listen. What does she need to do go water board someone before she can become a leader?

Theroux makes a comment about how most little boys are encouraged to act like monkeys while most girls need to show off their pretty dress. I think we have a prime example of that here. Most of my male students tend to act more like monkeys than normal people. During that same discussion one of my male students announced he had to pee before getting up and leaving the classroom. As a society we are convinced that female leaders have to act tough and hard like our typical male leaders. But here I have a student who fits the stereotypical female personality and can command the classroom much more effectively than I can. Even so, it always tends to be the monkey in the front of the classroom who gets most of the attention.